Total Chaos: You Just Met Your Match
by Lightning Latias
Summary: What happens when Teh Big Red Button leaves a bunch of anime characters and seriously confused school kids in the middle of nowhere with nobody but each other? Let's just say it's not exactly peaceful. Even I don't know where the pairings will end up!
1. Teh Big Red Button

_Going on a shopping trip in town, the Host Club were finally enjoying some well-earned fight-over-Haruhi time- sorry, peace and quiet. Honey stopped dead in his tracks, catching sight of something which always causes ultimate doom in fanfics: Teh Big Red Button. "Ooh, what's this?" he piped up, extending his finger towards it. "No, Honey-senpai!" Haruhi warned. "Don't touch Teh Big Red Button!" Her warning came too late. Honey had already pressed the button. Kaoru and Hikaru looked at each other, dreading the outcome of the tiny 17-year-old's mistake. With a classic flash, the Host Club vanished._

"_Hey, what's that? Ed, did you hear a noise?" Alphonse asked. "No, Al, you're losing it." Edward joked. Al couldn't help stopping to detect the source of the noise. Looking behind a nearby cardboard box, he found a tiny, meowing green kitten. "Odd colour for a kitten," he thought to himself, picking the kitten up and slipping it into his pocket. Running back to follow Ed, he noticed the signal of doom: Teh Big Red Button. Al decided it would be best to let the Homunculi trip over it or something, so he turned away to get on with his life. But sadly, that wasn't going to happen. The kitten launched itself out of his pocket, just as Winry ran around the corner to meet them. With an evil grin, the kitten pushed Teh Big Red Button with its paw. "That kitten looks strangely familiar…" Ed trailed off, looking at the kitten intently. The Elric brothers, Winry and the kitten disappeared in the clichéd blinding flash._

"_Okay, where to next?" Fever asked. "How about the new shopping centre?" Lightning suggested. "Okay, let's go!" Jessie agreed. Dragging their friends along behind them, hey soon came to the traffic lights. Fatima stopped in her tracks, realising that something looked suspicious about the lights… Had they been replaced? Nuha looked at her, puzzled. "What's the matter, Fart?" But time had run out. Fever had pushed the button on the lights, having no clue that it was actually… Yeah, you guessed it- Teh Big Red Button. Eden facepalmed at her friends' idiocy as they disappeared off the face of the earth in a flash._

"…Where are we?" Al wondered, rubbing his head.

"Dunno, looks like the middle of some random room." Ed commented. "Hey Al, there's a door over there. Want to see where it goes?"

"Are you sure?…" Winry trailed off.

Something was happening in the corner. The kitten was undergoing a strange process of transformation… Or maybe not so strange, considering who it actually was.

Ed facepalmed. "Please, no…"

"That's right, you're stuck with the green-haired psychopath!" Envy grinned.

Al sighed. "When am I old enough to commit suicide?"

* * *

"Fever, you idiot! Where are we?" Eden glared.

"I dunno." Fever shrugged.

"Let's open the door!" Lightning raised her eyebrows, gaining a very evil look.

"Guys, we're all animefied." Fatima said bluntly.

"Awesome!" Fever and Lightning squealed.

"Sad shounen manga readers." Nuha taunted.

"You'll regret that, Nu." Fever warned.

"What are we waiting for? Come on!" Lightning pulled the door handle and stepped through the door.

"Wait up!" Fever yelled, dragging her friends along behind her.

What they saw was not what they had bargained for.

Two doors opened on the other side of the square room they had entered. Lightning and Fever were completely stunned.

"Holy crap, it's the Host Club."

"And the Elric brothers."

"…And Envy." Lightning facepalmed. "God help us, we're all doomed."


	2. Musical Insanity

_Lucy was sitting in the cello section of her orchestra, getting ready to play something logic-defyingly complicated. However, being a musical genius, it was okay for her. She could handle any piece of music, fighting evil F-sharps- wait a second, this is the orchestra, not Superman… Anyhow, she picked up her bow and began playing in unison with the other cellos. But unfortunately for her, the bow of her cello slipped and hit… Teh Big Red Button. Suddenly something struck Lucy- it was very odd that six of her friends had been off school for so long. Where had they been? Little did she know, as she and Audrey the cello vanished in a flash, that she was about to find out._

Outside the building the unlikely group had found themselves in, Al had picked up a random piece of paper that had been lying around.

"What does it say, Alphonse-chan?" Honey chirped.

Al looked at the note again. "Muahaha, you guys are stuck here now. Good luck surviving."

"Eh? What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Ed exclaimed.

Everyone shrugged.

"Well, it looks like we have no means of getting back to where we all were, so I guess we're going to have to set up camp here…" Haruhi sighed.

"I'm bored," Ed grumbled, "Let's go inside."

* * *

Lucy looked around, confused. What had just happened? Why had the orchestra vanished and left her in the middle of a randomated room?

The door opened and Lightning and Nuha entered the room. They stopped in confusion upon seeing Lucy.

Lightning burst out laughing.

"OH MY GOD, LUCY! HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO GET HERE?! AND I THOUGHT YOU WERE SENSIBLE!"

Nuha facepalmed at Lightning, who was now dissolving into giggles.

"So, Nu, what's going on here?" Lucy asked.

"Eh, not much. We've managed to get ourselves here somehow. We think it was Teh Big Red Button." Nuha explained.

"Oh, like that thing my bow hit?"

"You hit Teh Big Red Button with Audrey's bow?!" Lightning hooted.

Lucy joined Nuha in facepalming at Lightning.

"Oh yeah, and we're stuck with a bunch of random anime characters." Nuha sighed. "Most of them are completely insane. Like Lightning."

* * *

Fatima sat down in the corner of the room, looking fed up. "I'm bored. If I had something to read it wouldn't be so bad…"

A book fell down from the ceiling (WHAT?! THE CEILING?!) and hit Fatima on the head.

"Ow. Wait a second… It's like that Requirement Room thing off Harry Potter!"

* * *

"Hey everyone, we've found Lucy!" Lightning yelled, dragging Lucy along by the arm.

"What?!" Jessie and Fatima ran over to them, looking extremely confused.

"Well, at least now there's someone _slightly_ sensible here apart from Al and Haruhi…" Nuha shrugged

"Nu, stop moaning. We've effectively gotten ourselves a holiday." Jessie shrugged.

"I MISS MY SCIENCE CLASSES!" Nuha wailed.

"I MISS PHYSICS, BUT I'M GONNA HAVE TO LIVE WITHOUT IT!!" Lightning imitated.

A physics textbook appeared out of nowhere and hit Lightning on the head, not unlike the book that had materialised earlier.

"Awesome!" Lightning began reading all about things like quantum physics, which hardly any sane people understand. But Lightning was pretty insane anyway, so there was no need to worry.

"Ooh, I never knew that *insert seriously long scientific theory which nobody understands*, that's epic!"

"I'm confused." Eden complained.

"Well, so is everyone else here." Haruhi pointed out.

"It looks like that Big Red Button phenomenon caused us all to teleport to the same place..." Kyouya muttered, scribbling in his notebook as usual.

"I am officially never touching a button again in my LIFE." Haruhi resolved.


	3. Fuery's Bad Idea

Envy was sitting in the middle of the floor, epically bored. There was nothing to do and the Fullmetal Shorty had decided to block off all the exits so nobody could get out. How frustrating.

Fever wandered over, her eyes glinting mischievously in the face of danger (as usual). "Oh my god, it's a palm tree!"

"Shut up."

"So, Envy, you don't deny that you're a palm tree, yet you tell me to shut up when I mention it?"

"Geez, go and play in a war zone."

"I couldn't even if I wanted to. Ed's alchemyfied the doors so we can't go anywhere."

At that moment, Nuha, who had previously been reading yaoi manga on the internet, decided to taunt Envy some more.

"Oh my god, Fever! It really is a palm tree!"

"STOP CALLING ME THAT!"

"Why should we? It's perfectly true." Fever countered, enjoying the opportunity to annoy the living daylights out of one of her most hated characters.

"Well, I can just do this." Envy shot back smugly, shifting his hair colour to black.

"What do you think, Fever? Gothic palm tree? Charred palm tree?" Nuha mock-wondered. Across the room, Ed stifled a giggle at the thought of Mustang frazzling Envy again.

"I think it's more along the lines of mourning palm tree." Lucy shouted from the other end of the room.

"WHY YOU-"

"I have a feeling you're the ones who'll be mourning if you don't cut it out." Lightning shot her friends a withering glare. Nuha and Fever backed away slowly.

Lightning paused for a second, then her face lit up in a moment of random genius. "Let's all sing The Midget Song!"

"The WHAT song?" Ed growled.

"The Llama Song, but midget version! Come on, I'll teach you guys!"

"Song time, Haru-chan!" Honey started bouncing around like the little bouncy cute ninja dude he was.

"Nu, Fever, you two join in!" Lightning yelled.

Fatima facepalmed. "If there's one thing worse that Jessie singing, it's those three singing…"

Unfortunately for her, there was no stopping The Midget Song- or those singing it.

"_Here's a midget, there's a midget_

_Edward Elric is a midget…"_

Midget- sorry, Ed- somehow resisted the urge to brutally murder all three of them.

"…_Edward says, "I'M NOT A MIDGET!"_

_Midget midget duck_

_Midget midget Winry midget_

_Alphonse Ling potato midget_

_Midget midget Havoc midget_

_Midget midget duck_

_I was a homunculus_

_I lived in the lair_

_But I never saw the way_

_How Armstrong lost his hair_

_Hawkeye shot the Colonel_

_He ran out of luck…"_

Ed could totally see that happening if Colonel Pyromaniac kept going with the miniskirt thing in front of Hawkeye. Naturally, he'd offer to do it for her. As a gesture of kindness, of course…

"…_Greed lost his subordinates_

_And became a duck_

_Did you ever see a midget_

_Angry midget, granny midget_

_Winry chasing after midget_

_Midget midget duck_

_Fuery, Fuhrer, Falman, midget_

_Palm tree, Pride, Amestris, midget_

_May the Xingese princess midget_

_Midget midget duck_

_Now the war in Ishbal's done_

_Marcoh's getting old_

_Xerxes is a ruin now_

_And Briggs is freezing cold_

_Roy's got too much paperwork_

_Hughes ran out of luck_

_Kimbley's locked in prison now_

_And Scar became a duck_

_Lan Fan, Wrath, Izumi, midget_

_Black Hayate, Central, midget_

_Yoki, Mustang, Hawkeye, midget_

_Midget midget duck_

_Father, Hohenheim and midget_

_Gluttony and Lust and midget_

_Breda, Sloth and Greed and midget_

_Midget midget duck_

_Fuery's lost his specs again_

_Hawkeye's lost her gun_

_Gluttony got mad at Roy_

_And then ate everyone_

_They escaped with Envy's stone_

_And drove off in a truck_

_Time for them to retire now_

_And become a duck!"_

Envy and the host club cheered.

Al looked very concerned.

Ed nearly exploded.

"Winry, can I kill them now?"

"Hey boss!" Hikaru squeaked before Winry could answer, pointing a trembling finger at the ceiling.

"It's a h-h-h-hole in the ceiling!" Kaoru decided to hide behind Mori, much to Haruhi's amusement.

Everyone else facepalmed. Again.

*Central Military Headquarters, 5 minutes earlier*

"This is boring. If Colonel Mustang hasn't told us to do anything, what are we supposed to do?" Falman complained.

"How about we make a bet on something, like who gets a girlfriend first?" Breda suggested.

"Nah, we've done that already." Havoc pointed out. "And anyway, that's boring. Can't you think of anything better to do?"

"…I have an idea." Fuery volunteered.

After a long and heated debate about who was going to carry out the prank, it was eventually decided that Breda would put a note on Colonel Mustang's desk telling him not to do any work. Breda wrote the words "DON'T DO ANY WORK" on a sticky note and stuck it on top of a red, circular object on the Colonel's desk. He rushed back to his seat and continued losing the game of chess he had been playing with Falman.

"I wonder if he'll notice the note…" Fuery spoke for everyone. After all, the prank wouldn't be much use if he didn't see the sticky note. As everyone was pondering how depressed they would be at the failure of their pathetic attempt at a practical joke, the door creaked open and the Colonel himself walked in, followed as always by a stern-looking Hawkeye.

"Speak of the Colonel," Havoc muttered, "and the Colonel shall appear…"

"It seems like you have a lot of paperwork to get through today, sir." Hawkeye hinted. That paperwork had been building up for weeks like a miniature skyscraper on the desk. How was she going to protect Roy if she couldn't see him for all the paperwork?

"Maybe not. Looks like my desk has been fitted with one of those no-work buttons." Roy announced smugly.

"…" Hawkeye looked at him quizzically.

"See, this nice shiny button says "DON'T DO ANY WORK" on it. So if I press it, maybe I won't have to do any boring paperwork."

"Sir, I don't think that's a good idea-"

Too late, Roy had pushed … the Big Red Button that Breda had placed the note on.

Team Mustang fell through the hole in the ceiling and landed in a heap in the middle of the room.

Ed said a very naughty word that little kiddies shouldn't hear.

"Aww…" Lightning frowned. "They missed The Midget Song…"


	4. Invasion of the Randomsaurus

"So, how did you guys get here?" Al asked.

"Well…" Fuery began. "On second thoughts, you tell them."

"Why me?" Havoc complained.

"Cos you're the least likely to start having a giggle fit."

"Says who?"

"Says Breda."

"Fine, I'll tell them. You see, Colonel Mustang hadn't given us anything to do, so we were all about to die of boredom until Fuery came up with an idea. He said we should stick a note on the Colonel's desk telling him not to do any paperwork. So Breda went up to write the note and obviously took it into his head to write on a button on the desk. Then Colonel Mustang and Lieutenant Hawkeye came in and the Colonel pressed the button… and then we ended up here."

"Was the button big and red?" Lightning enquired.

"I think so."

"Another Big Red button, then."

Eden facepalmed. "Well duh, Einstein."

Nuha randomly pointed her finger at Eden. "It's Eggenstein!"

"By the way," Fatima explained, "We all have weird nicknames, in case you guys are getting confused."

Haruhi grinned in recognition. "So do we. Tamaki's Obnoxious Dude, Hikaru and Kaoru are Thing 1 and Thing 2, Mori's BFG, Honey's Powerpuff and Kyouya's The Scribbler of Satan."

"Hey, why does he get to be Thing 1?"

"Because I'm awesome."

"Anyway," Fatima continued, "Eden's Eggy, Nuha's Nu, Jessie's JAP because of her initials, and Lucy's Cindy Lu."

"OI, DON'T CALL ME JAP!"

"What about you, Fati-chan? Do you have a nickname?" Honey asked.

"…My nickname's Fart."

Everyone except Fartima, Hawkeye and Kyouya burst into giggles.

-A few blocks down the street-

Random Dude: Can you hear that noise? It sounds like a giant having a laughing fit…

Random Dude's Wife: Is it an earthquake or something?

Random Spotty Teen: Is it a bird? Is it a plane?

Random Dude No. 2: No, it's Pooperman! –cackles evilly before blowing up a random building-

Darth Vader: I AM YOUR MOTHER, LUKE! –chucks tins of Spaghetti-O's at everyone, KO-ing them, then makes his/her escape-

Random Pigeon: O-kayyyyy….

Once everyone had recovered from the giggle attack, Roy and Havoc had started playing chess, Ed was attempting to beat Envy up for being a –BEEP- and calling him a shrimp, Lightning was standing around looking bored, Nuha was reading M-rated yuri manga on the internet, Eden was baking a cake (…lolwut?), Fever was telling Honey about the dangers of doing ANYTHING WHATSOEVER that Nuha did (except maybe breathing), Winry was searching for something to bash with a wrench and Allen Walker was doing the conga with Lenalee and the Teletubbies (far, FAR away, fortunately).

"I keep telling you, pipsqueak, it's no use. I'm way stronger than you." Envy dodged Ed's next punch and backflipped across the room, then proceeded to make faces at Ed.

"Show-off." Lightning accused. "…Hey, what's that?"

A hole was opening up in the side of the wall. Upon seeing exactly who was coming through, the host club nearly died.

"Here I am, darlings!" Renge trilled.

Kyouya had the common sense to lock himself into a cupboard.


	5. Crisp Packets and Broken Windows

It was 11:27pm and the whole building was quiet for once. Lightning had gone to sleep in a handy cupboard fixed to the wall. Tamaki was sleeping on the sofa. Hikaru and Kaoru were sleeping under the sofa. Al was out for a moonlit walk. Envy had morphed into a cat and curled up on the table. Everyone else had had to make do with the floor.

Hearing a rumbling noise in the distance, Envy sleepily opened one eye. Nothing happened. He twitched his whiskers in annoyance and let his eye slide shut again. Just as he was nearly asleep, the table started to vibrate. His eyes flashed open and he jumped off the table, reverting to human form. As the noise got ever closer, Envy decided it would be wise to wake someone (preferably someone with a gun) in case it was Dante on a forklift truck. But how…

"HOLY TRUTH, THERE'S A GIANT YAOI-READING T-REX IN THE CLOSET!"

Fever woke up with a jolt and jumped straight into a fighting stance. Lightning fell out of the cupboard and nearly managed to break several bones with her awkward landing.

"Mmmh… yaoi… where's my cake?" Honey sleep-mumbled.

This woke all six remaining members of the Host Club and sent them running in all directions, bashing into walls, each other, you name it. Tamaki tripped over Ed, who poked Winry with his automail, making her throw a spanner in retaliation, which hit Roy, who sent a blast of fire out of the window, whose broken glass hit Alphonse, who had just returned from outside.

"Is everything okay in there?" Al shouted, waking a very confused Honey.

"Um, not really." Haruhi called back after bumping into a door for the fourth time.

"What was that about yaoi-reading dinosaurs, Envy?" Lightning hissed. "Or was it just an exceptionally irritating palm tree?"

"Ooh, harsh!" Fever smirked.

"Forget the taunts, let's have some light in here." Roy snapped his fingers and sent out a spark, setting light to a nearby stick.

"Sir, why were you wearing your gloves when you were asleep? And why on earth was there a stick there?" Hawkeye questioned.

"Oh, the stick? That was for my dog." Tamaki grinned. As if on cue, in galloped the huge, beribboned fluffy mass that was Tamaki's pet. She jumped up and licked him in the face, causing Tamaki to stumble backwards and trip over Renge, whom the dog presently stepped on and squished, waking her up and inflicting the lady manager's wrath on all within fifteen feet of her…

"Can't a girl get ANY sleep here? Why am I stuck with you lot anyway? I could be doing better things with my time! I could be managing French Vogue by now…"

_...rumble, rumble…_

"…I choose to stay behind and look after you idiots! Except you, Kyouya, you're not an idiot, tee hee. BUT THE REST OF YOU, especially the small one who's actually not stupid at all, you're all stupid beyond belief…"

…_RUMBLE RUMBLE RUMBLE…_

"… can't believe how much time and effort I've wasted on you all! And while you're at it, what was that note I found in Tamaki's handwriting about me being a Mary Sue? After all I've done for you, how could you do this to me…"

…_**RUMBLE RUMBLE RUMBLE RUMBLE RUMBLE RUMBLE RUMBLE…**_

"…all the pride I had in myself is destroyed forever! And all because I cared about you too much to notice how ungrateful you all were! …WHY IS NOBODY LISTENING TO ME?"

_**-*CRASH!*-**_

Everyone turned in amazement to the wall, which seemed to have just been demolished by something, judging by the smoke coming out of the massive hole that hadn't been there 2.4 seconds ago. Slowly, the smoke dispersed before the onlookers, to reveal…

…A teenaged girl on a motorbike?

_-*Flashback*-_

"_Are you sure everything'll be all right?" The lilac-haired youth took off her helmet as the boy in front slammed on the motorcycle's brakes, bringing the vehicle skidding to a halt. _

"_Yeah, Shizuku. It's gonna be great. Bob's agreed to break up the gang rivalry after all. We can all face the Destroying Gang of Doom together now! With our combined forces, Skull Man can never beat us!"_

"_That's awesome, Shinji!" Shizuku hopped off the motorbike and joined hands with her companion. The sun set behind them as they set off into the heart of the city, towards the territory of the Wonder Wheels gang, a group of motorcyclist fiercely loyal to their leader- and Shinji's archrival- Bob Billy._

_-34 minutes later-_

"_So, you two finally made it." Bob grinned, sweeping back his bright red hair._

"_That's right! On behalf of the Zoom Zoom gang, I declare an end to the rivalry between our gangs! It's great we're finally friends again, I was really starting to miss the days when we were best pals." Shinji smiled._

"_Ha ha, me too!" Bob laughed. Shizuku heaved a massive sigh of relief, finally able to relax. What with all the inter-gang tension, she had began to wonder whether there would ever be peace between the two rival gangs._

_It had been years since Shizuku had been able to see the sheer happiness on Shinji's face. The two boys ran towards each other and hugged each other tightly… but what Shinji didn't see was the flash of silver as Bob drew out a knife and plunged it into Shinji's back._

_Shizuku looked on in despair, paralysed by shock and sheer disbelief. Why would Bob want to take Shinji's life? Now he lay dying, her best friend and only love, and she couldn't even move. The only thing she could think of was vengeance. Somehow she'd have her revenge, even if it killed her. Shizuku steadied her breathing, narrowed her eyes and reached into her back pocket. Only for emergencies, Shinji's voice echoed. Well, if this wasn't an emergency, what was?_

_Without hesitation, Shizuku drew the gun, aimed it at Bob, and pulled the trigger…_

_-*Back to present*-_

"So you killed Bob to avenge Shinji…?" Winry was awestruck at the magnitude of the situation.

"Heh, kind of like how you tried to kill me to avenge your smart-alec friend." Envy glared at Roy.

Lightning smirked. "But the palm tree was too awesome."

"Shut up, fangirl."

"I AM NOT A FANGIRL, YOU LITTLE-"

"SHE SAID LITTLE!" Ed shrieked, making all the banshees in the world hang their heads in shame. "EVEN THOUGH SHE WASN'T EVEN TALKING TO ME, SHE STILL SAID IT!"

"Everyone, now's not the time for disputes." Haruhi intervened. "We need to find a way to help Shizuku. Yes, what she did was stupid, but if the police find her she's doomed."

"And I'll get an even longer sentence since I'm from a biker manhwa!" Shizuku sobbed.

"Told you biker manhwas were all the same." Nuha shrugged. "Bad guy stabs main character in front of his girlfriend, blah blah."

"Shut up, Nu! We have to help her!" Fatima hissed.

"Just because you'd do the same if Eden got stabbed."

"THIS IS NOT A YURI FANFIC, YOU-"

*Please insert shoujo-manga-reading person being beaten up by two angry friends of said person.*

Once the riot had finally calmed, everyone had gathered around a crisp packet on the ground in the middle of the room. There was no fire, and according to Hikaru, a crisp packet was the next best thing.

"Hear ye, hear ye!" Tamaki called imperiously. "We are holding this council of awesomeness to determine-"

Renge picked up a convenient baseball bat and hit Tamaki over the head with it, KO'ing him. "There, much better. Now, does anyone have any ideas?"

Lightning raised a hand. "We could let her stay here. I mean, we're already a bunch of randomers, what harm will one more character do?"

"Shut up, fangirl." Envy smirked, enjoying the chance to irritate another human.

"FOR THE LAST FLIPPING TIME, I AM NOT A FANGIRL!"

"Yawn yawn, rubbish idea, NEXT!" Renge declared.

"We could build her a house." Al suggested.

"Nah, too much awesome alchemy involved." Renge sighed. "It would make us look too ordinary."

Kyouya momentarily ceased his scribbling. "We could always let her stay here."

"Of course!" Renge beamed. "That's the best idea I've ever heard from anyone! Apart from that one time I was in this fanfic when you asked me to go out with you… erm, did I just say that out loud? Anyway, that's settled. Shizuku's staying with us until she feels ready to move on!"

Just at that moment, something big, balding and sparkly fell through a hole in the ceiling.

Ed screamed and curled up into a foetal position, desperately trying to calm himself and save his sanity.

Everyone else shielded their eyes as Major Alex Louis Armstrong- yes, _him_- picked himself up off the floor and glanced round, looking at the Colonel as if to say, "What the (BEEP) just happened?"

After the Major had received an explanation and been interrogated as to whether he had touched anything big, red and buttony (which he had), nobody had been able to sleep. Of course, the Big Red Button situation was new to Shizuku too. Two new arrivals in one night! Everyone was far too alert now to even think about rest. Ed and Winry had decided to spend a bit of time outside under the moonlit sky.

"Well, this is weird. Alchemy, Philosopher's Stones, homunculi trying to kill us all and now we're stuck out here." Ed sighed.

"I know, but you better not break your auto- eep!" Winry caught her foot on a stone, but was saved from the fall by Ed catching her hand just in time. "Thanks, Ed."

"Wouldn't have been able to do that if you hadn't built me this hand. It's beautiful tonight, isn't it?"

"They say the stars look ten times more beautiful if someone you love is near you." Winry was almost glad that Ed's hand was automail. She still hadn't let go of it, and he wouldn't be able to feel how tightly she was squeezing it. If this was a dream, she didn't want to wake up for a while yet.

"Never knew that. You learn something new every day…" Ed tuned to face his childhood friend. Winry was blushing so hard she could barely meet his glance. Suddenly she threw her arms around him as if she hadn't seen him in years, although had that been the case she'd have been more likely to hurl a wrench at him.

"I'm so glad you're still here… there were so many times I thought I was going to lose you! You wouldn't believe how worried I've been…"

"Actually, I would." Edward whispered, holding her closer. "Remember, even if I don't come back one day, just carry on with everything. The next time you cry, it's going to be out of happiness."

"EDWARD ELRIC, YOU MUST COME! " Major Armstrong yelled from the doorway, interrupting the EdWin fluff. "There's an incredibly grave situation at hand!"

"Envy killed Colonel Mustang? Whatever, no big deal."

"NO, EDWARD, MUCH WORSE THAN THAT. THIS… IS… _WAR_."


End file.
